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Hey, Blue Derkin - Where You Been At?

Hey. Remember me?
OK, strike that. Man! I did NOT want to start things back up like this.
I'm not sure how I wanted to start things back up. It wasn't like this, though. I thought it would be friendlier, more convivial -- like, "Hey. Do you still like Happy Hours? What, don't you drink anymore? Ah, I've been there. Want a cig? What? You don't do that either?"

Don't Start Rumors

Easy there, rumor-monger. First of all, I still drink. True, I don't smoke anymore, but it's a less a health issue than a "sick of getting nagged by my wife, mother, and sisters" issue. And yes -- I still enjoy Happy Hours.

But...

Speaking of things I enjoy, I enjoy money. And while I don't necessarily enjoy working, I personally can't think of of a better way to get money. And believe me, I've tried. I've tried inheriting it, I've tried getting people to pay me rent, I've tried collecting dividends -- none of these methods brought in money as reliably as working at a job.

So It's Gonna Be Like That, Is It?

So that's what I did, and I went out there and worked at some places. One sold juice and other stuff, and another hosted web sites (it's particularly strong in the VPS hosting field, a difficult subject at the best of times, but pretty ably explained in this article by one Blue Derkin).

Which Brings Us To Pretty Much Now, Then

And that's what I've been doing. And I've gone to the occasional Happy Hour. Palomino is good. They have an "all night long" kinda thing, with $5 pizzas, half-price appetizers, and $4 wine. BarFood is nice as well -- they do an "all night every night" thing too, at least for now) with free hotdogs until 7:00 PM, $3.50 pints, and cheap appetizers. I also like their potato puffs. And there are other ones, too.

He Said "Other Ones." What Does That Mean?

Speaking of "other" and "ones," some "other ones" are out there as well. I've seen at least three other Los Angeles-themed Happy Hour blogs out there. All three are fine blogs -- a little girly for my tastes, but the world certainly needs a view from the softer side's perspective So I guess it's all well and good to bring back a little dose of manly to this scene.

Oh, Man - Did He Just Call Himself "Manly?"

So welcome back. To me.

'Tis The Season

...for sleigh-rides to great-uncle's, for music on the victrola and harpsichord, for battercakes and meat-pies, and, of course, for desserts replete with pepper-fruits and salt-tokens.

What I wish it were more often the season for is regular, more frequent updates. I'm not one to admit fault (generally speaking -- ask my wife), but I will admit a certain level of slacking when it's come to regular posting.

Here's the problem -- when you write a blog about Happy Hours, that means you have to a) go to Happy Hours; and b) find the time to write about them. Since August, I've done and had neither.

Sorry. We'll be back after the new year. Best to you, and yours.

La Vie Est Belle at La Poubelle

There's an old saying that goes something like "Life is what happens when you're making other plans."

I suppose that's a propos enough, but in my case, it's more like "Life gets in the way of my plans."

For example, I've been planning to post this review for some time now, but certain boring and mundane details of my life have intruded on those plans.

But there's no use in lamenting the past -- the most beautiful life, I've found, is one where excuses are washed away in waves of fine food and drink, in seas of friendship, and clouds of fragrant, delicious smoke.
Such was the case this summer, when Francoise and Jinnie hosted the HappyHourLA crew at La Poubelle, which is, without question, one of my favorite eating and drinking establishment in the Hollywood area.

Why should an unassuming French bistro, open these past forty years, hold such an esteemed place in the heart of this seeker of the good time value? In a word: hospitality.

From the moment you walk through La Poubelle, which looks out on a bustling stretch of Franklin Avenue, you are welcomed as a friend, a family member, a guest, a lover or a co-conspirator -- you can be many things at La Poubelle, but you are never simply a patron.



It's this sort of continental feeling at La Poubelle that makes you want to spend an entire evening there. Sidle, swagger, or swish up to the bar and order that first drink -- no worries, there'll soon be some food to accompany that libation. Have another, or maybe go out onto the patio to let the gloaming envelop you while a comrade and a cigarette keep you company. In a short time, you'll likely be surrounded by your dearest friends (some of whom you may have just met), and it's not outside of the realm of possibility that one of those will be the owner.

Try feeling that vibe at another place around town. I'll be on the patio at La Poubelle, waiting for you to come back and admit that such a place, except the one at which you just arrived, simply does not exist in Los Angeles.

Unique, remarkable, perfect -- that's what we look for in a Five Ring Friday, and that's why we'll be having another at La Poubelle, just as soon as they ask us back. We'll be there.

And I could wax poetic all day about this wonderful place, and the wonderful staff that makes you feel like so much more than a customer, and the owners, Francoise and Jacqueline, whose continental sensibilities imbue the entire operation with a certain je ne sais quois -- it's easy enough to go on and on about. But I think I'll leave it at "thank you" -- thanks to Francoise and Jacqueline, to Jinnie, to Johnny, to Tess, to Janean, to Blue Moon and Peroni, and finally, to everyone who attended. I appreciate your support for our venture. But, like when they say, "Instead of flowers, please give to...," I would say instead of supporting me, support wonderful local establishments like La Poubelle. It's what HappyHourLA is all about -- good food, good drinks, good friends, and great deals.

.38 Special and 38 Specials

Name: South
Coordinates: 3001 Wilshire Blvd., 90403
Neighborhood: SaMo -- ok, only tools say that. Santa Monica.
Happiest Hours: Plenty, but for starters, M-F 3-8pm. Read the review, jerks!

There's no shortage of urban dwellers who have strange and often misguided opinions about the rest of the country. Not me, of course. I'm the very apogee of fairness and judiciousness. I have perfectly accurate, healthy, and informed views about other parts of this great country, this hemisphere, and the world at large.

But alas, not everyone can be as cosmopolitan and well-informed as me. In fact, it's been to my horror and chagrin that I've realized that most people AREN'T that way.

For example.

My beloved wife, who grew up here in Los Angeles, took a road trip across the Deep South a couple of years ago. While she found the scenery beautiful, the company delightful, and the time off relaxing, she kept running into attitudes that horrified her beyond words. Like the time she and her friend asked a woman convenience-store clerk for directions, and were told, "You know, I don't rightly know. Y'all should ask a man."

I like to imagine that, in the wife's head, a record screeched to a halt.

My point here (and of course I have a point) is that while I, great respecter of cultural differences that I am, would have found that to be a charming throwback to a more genteel time and place. My wife, on the other hand, didn't quite see things that way.

I guess I just have more innate tolerance for cultural differences.

While the above story might well accurately represent The South, it doesn't really do justice to South, the LA-area's version of our neighbors below the Mason-Dixon Line. But then again, it's a certain version of The South -- less mint juleps, seersucker, and gentlemanly duels for honor and more General Lee, Southern Rock, and shooting guns in the air to celebrate major holidays and life occasions.

Oh, and specials. Amazing Happy Hour specials.

And not just Happy Hour specials.

The Vitals: South has, near as I can reckon, one of the finest Happy Hours on the Westside, going from 3-8pm Monday through Fridays, during which all pitchers of draft beer are $10, well drinks are cheap, and certain appetizers are half-off. But it doesn't stop there -- not by a country mile. South ALSO has (as it was my enormous pleasure to discover) Trivia Night on Wednesdays! It's hosted by owner Adam Milstein -- who does a fine job -- and features a pretty robust prize structure. Moreover, during said quiz, the Buffalo Wings are 20 for $5! Now that's enough to get me to darken any door more than once -- wings, beer, and trivia? Come on. I'm only human. But South ALSO has a "Recession Thursdays," featuring the usual Happy Hour deals until midnight, PLUS $1 grilled cheese, $2 "mystery shots, and $3 sloppy joes. Toss in a nice open layout, plenty of TVs, a decent staff and ownership, and solid food and drink all around, and you've got (docking the requisite points for being a University of Michigan-affiliated bar during the College Football season) a yee-hawin', Dixie-whistlin', gator rasslin' good time.

This (Liquid) Kitty Has Claws

Name: Liquid Kitty
Coordinates: 11780 W. Pico Blvd., 90064
Neighborhood: West LA, but spiritually closer to Downtown
Happiest Hours: M-F 5pm-8pm and all night Sundays, plus rock-bottom "Recession" pricing on Tuesdays and Wednesdays.
Apparently, even nightlife impresarios, including The Single-handed Savior of Downtown Los Angeles, have to get their start somewhere.

I mean, of course, in this case Cedd Moses, whose march to conquer the the Downtown LA nightlife scene has been met with cheers, thrown laurels, and winsome and comely girls of virtue true. That's unlike Sam Nazarian's march through Hollywood, was more like the Soviet Union's march through Eastern Europe. Except for, you know, the whole "selling out to reality television" thing.

The difference, though, is while Nazarian (and his minion, Brent Bolthouse) make clubs and nightspots that celebrities and the people who care about celebrities want to go to, Moses and his 213Downtown collective make bars that LA people want to go to. Given the choice between going to Area or Hyde and Seven Grand or the Golden Gopher, I'll take the latter two every time, as will the vast majority of locals I know. Clubs like Area are for people who think that's what LA is like all the time, while Moses's bars are for people who are glad that clubs like Area exist to draw the gawkers and the shiny-black-shoes crowd away from the good places.

The only bummer about this whole dime-store-psychology breakdown of the LA bar scene is this -- for us Westsiders, it's a bit of a hike to make it Downtown, and into Moses-controlled turf. And, while that may technically be true, I -- being your intrepid, Sherpa-like guide and host -- found a little loophole that you can bust out in case of emergency.

Did you know that Cedd Moses used to own Liquid Kitty? Until a couple of weeks ago, I didn't.

But you know, now that I DO know that fact, it all kind of makes sense. Here's a bar that's been around a while, serves pretty great drinks that are made with care and good ingredients, and whose decor/overall theme hearkens back to a simpler, more drink-oriented time. And, given the kind of businesses and buildings that surround Liquid Kitty, it wasn't in the world's best or coolest neighborhood when it first opened. In that sense, the LA bar scholar can look at Liquid Kitty as a sort petri dish, or test kitchen, for Moses's grand designs on Downtown.

The Vitals: Liquid Kitty serves booze. Great big glasses of booze. No appetizers. No small bites menu. In fact, no food at all. Only booze. But, despite the "Swingers"-era-looking neon martini glass sign out front, they do a little bit more than just six ounces of chilled vodka in a glass. Rather, they have some nice, old-school cocktails made with care by (in this case) Damian, a 12-year veteran of the place. Prices and specials are good -- $4 well drinks, $4 "Lowlifes"( i.e, a shot and a can of PBR), and $9 specialty drinks, which are jumbo-yet-well-made cocktails like the Manhattan and the Sazerac. Moreover, there's none of this "ultralounge" pretentious bullshit that pervades Hollywood -- in fact, Liquid Kitty has much more of a classic-but-divey feel about it, just like Moses's latest Downtown efforts. So, in a sense, the place is not only a sociological middle ground of Moses's career as a nightlife maven (he doesn't have a stake in the place anymore), but it's also a place to witness the changing tastes of LA's nightlife culture as a whole. It's almost like "Mad Men," which attempts to show the transition between "The Greatest Generation" and the Boomers. That's my pitch -- if Liquid Kitty were a TV show, it would be "Mad Men." And if "Mad Men" was a bar, it would be Liquid Kitty.
Or hell, maybe it's just a good bar with great deals.

The Belmont Shakes

Name: The Belmont Cafe
Coordinates: 747 N. La Cienega Blvd., 90069
Neighborhood: West Hollywood, aka Friday Traffic Hellscape
Happiest Hours: Numerous, but mainly daily, 4-7pm

Readers who, for whatever reason, keep coming back to this site know that I'm a sucker for the clever headline. Sometimes, I'm such a slave to the overusage of said trope that it's a real stretch to see the humor in it. Such might be the case this time -- you can read the above headline a few different ways. Is it merely a hackneyed play on a familiar term? Does it represent a medical condition, or merely an anticipatory state? I'll leave that to you, the reader, to decide...

One thing is for sure, though -- The Belmont, located on La Ciengega in West Hollywood, is a must-try Happy Hour destination for those stuck between the West and East sides of town. It has it all -- the deals, the patio, the surly waitstaff waiting for 7:00pm to hit. Not surly. Distracted. As in thinking, "Why hasn't that casting agent called yet?" Or maybe, "Wasn't this guy here for Happy Hour yesterday?"

That's LA, I suppose. But The Belmont should be lauded, and loudly, for their commitment to the deal as a means of getting people through the door. Check out their Web site -- they've got deals literally every day of the week, from the daily Happy Hour to the Sunday Brunch to some sort of obscenely large bucket of seafood. And those who know me know that I'm gonna get behind any place that serves food in a bucket.

The Vitals: Simply put, The Belmont distinguishes itself from its neighbors in its too-cool-for-school neighborhood by actually acting like they want customers. As mentioned before, their Happy Hour is undoubetedly solid, lasting from 4-7pm every day and offering half-off drinks and appetizers. Sure, with a location like theirs and deals like that, it's going to attract some Ed Hardy/Affliction/guys-in-TrueReligion-jeans-types, and it's going to be crowded, and the servers aren't going to hold your hand through the ordering process; but in this case the amenities far outweigh the drawbacks. To me, half-off plus patio plus Friday equals delightful.

Demain. C'est vendredi, 31 juillet

That's tomorrow, Friday, July 31.
Our next "Five Ring Friday Event."
Allons, tout le monde.



and...



What else do you need?

West Midlands, Or West Valley?

Name: The White Harte Pub
Coordinates: 22456 Ventura Blvd., 91364
Neighborhood: The surface of the sun, AKA Woodland Hills
Happiest Hours: M-F 4-7pm

Here's a cultural curiosity -- why are there so many British pubs in the West Valley?

I, for one (and for once, my wife would say) have no real theories to offer on this one -- just random speculation. Is it the hot, dry weather that draws the Brits? Is it the easy access to the freeways and bus lines? Is there some sort of banger supply house in Canoga Park that I'm unaware of?

Whatever the reason, I think you'll agree with me that the area has more than its fair share of pubs. They've got Pickwick's (already reviewed here), Scotland Yard (a personal favorite, especially for daytime drinking), and now the White Harte Pub, which is located about as far west as you can get while still being in the San Fernando Valley as opposed to the Conejo Valley. That's for all you geography nerds out there.

OK, I'm a geography nerd. Whatever. This isn't about me. It's about the White Harte, a not-too-shabby drinkery that should be on your list of stops should you find yourself at the Walmart on Fallbrook. Or that one bowling alley. Or, for whatever reason, way the hell out in Woodland Hills.

The Vitals: The White Harte Pub has a pretty decent thing going on at Happy Hour. Though I didn't detect too many authentic accents, there was "football" on the "telly," as well as enough in the way of Happy Hour special to get Winston Churchill tipsy. $4 (with some as low as $3.25) drafts -- excuse me, "draughts" -- $4 cocktails, and half-off appetizers. The food is pretty decent (that is, if your dining companions don't order the vegetarian pizza -- come on, girls!) if long in the making. The wait staff is just surly enough to remind you where are -- the Valley, in a British pub. On the upside, they have a one of those awesome misters out on the smoking patio, which comes in pretty handy, whether you're waiting in line at Coachella or just in Woodland Hills when it's 106 degrees out. Ah, just like the summer I spent studying Shakespeare in Stratford-upon-Avon.

All in all, it's no Cock n' Bull, but a suitable enough respite should you find yourself miles from any recognizable landmarks and parched beyond mention. You know, like that British guy...what's his name? Oh yeah, Lawrence of Arabia.

next friday ...

Laissez les Bon Temps Roulez!

Name: Bourbon Street Shrimp
Coordinates: 10928 W. Pico Blvd., 90064
Neighborhood: Walking distance...I mean, West LA
Happiest Hours: Daily, 5-8pm

Let me be frank about something up front. I've never been to New Orleans, and I'm in no particular hurry to arrange and execute my inaugural visit.

While I can certainly appreciate the history of the place -- French Colonialism, Battle of New Orleans, Crazy Jim Garrison, The Vampire Lestat -- it just doesn't appeal to me. I'm sorry to anyone who might be from there, and I certainly don't mean any disrespect in light of the city's many problems -- crushing poverty, a high murder rate, or proximity to unfortunate weather. Although I think living in a city that's below sea level carries with it a certain amount of inherent risk, I feel for those savaged by Hurricane Katrina and those who feel like a piece of their culture was lost as a result of said hurricane. Hell, I even don;t mean to offend those people who love to pull up their shirts to get beaned in the face with plastic beads. All I know is that NOLA, Mardi Gras, JazzFest, and malarial heat and swamp denizens just don't appeal to me.

I do, however, share one commonality with residents with New Orleans and, for that matter, like 99.9% of humanity. I like shrimp. And as most people know, I like a Happy Hour that that offers a great value. And, if the two are combined, I also dislike driving after experiencing the same.

It is this peculiar mix of circumstances that leads me to Bourbon Street Shrimp time and time again.

Now, I'll admit the place has its certain charms -- attractive and attentive staff, proximity to my apartment, and hearty beverages -- as well as its drawbacks. The food is only OK, the clientele might not be the cream of the cultural crop, and let's face it -- any Cajun-themed place that names itself "Bourbon Street" anything is probably pretty lacking in imagination. Bourbon Street Shrimp on Pico, though, outweighs these drawbacks with one secret weapon -- a great, lengthy Happy Hour just dripping with value.

The Vitals: Simply put, even if you ignore the so-so menu, Bourbon Street Shrimp's Happy Hour is pretty damn great. First, it goes EVERY DAY from 5-8pm. That fact alone puts it head and shoulders above most places. Secondly, it offers "2-for-1" Ketel One, Jack Daniels, and margaritas. Thus, an $8 dollar vodka and soda becomes a stout double. Do the math. It's a good deal. And finally, there's a healthy selection of $4 appetizers, and all entrees are half-priced. Hey, where I come from, half-priced "meh" is better than full-priced "oh, splendid." And frankly, there are some things on the menu that are pretty great. Their tacos, for one, as well as their blackened shrimp both do the trick. And the place stays busy enough to assure me that there food isn't the swill some reviewers on Yelp seem to say it is. Not that I've ever really trusted the Yelp community to give solid reviews, but still. I guess it's just another one of many strikes against Yelp, and another tally in the "yes" column for HappyHourLA. Was it the best food ever at a Happy Hour? No. Was it sufficient to line a certain patron's stomach so he wouldn't get too...happy off the 2-for-1 specials? Again, no. But was it a good Happy Hour? Absolutely yes.

Take that, Yelp. You've proven my point yet again -- never, ever trust anyone who actively refers to themselves as a "foodie." That's like calling yourself a "hipster." And honestly, who would do that?

Five Ring Friday, Take One

Here at HappyHourLA, we sometimes get a little tired of looking around for the best deals and Happy Hours that LA has to offer. I mean, we're only human, right? We've come across many, many good ones, to be sure. And we've also stumbled across a few places that have, well, stumbled, in our opinion. That's the nature of the best, I suppose, but like I said, sometimes we get tired.

And that's when we decide to take matters into our own hands and host our own parties.

You may remember, a few weeks back, us alluding to something "big" on the horizon. Well, that big thing came and went, and in our minds (and in the minds of those who attended), it was a real success.

We held the event at Citizen Smith in Hollywood, which is a beautiful venue at which to host a party. It's got the space, the ambiance, and the skilled staff (much thanks to Luke, who runs a fully enjoyable but no-nonsense kind of bar) to handle events of any size, even while running their normal operations. The food at Citizen Smith is a delightful mix of down-home and haute cuisine (think delicious mac-n-cheese, sliders, and the like), and everyone was glad to arrive, get out of the horrible Friday traffic, sink down into a booth on the patio, and enjoy some great food and drink. Thanks to Chris and Brett for letting it happen in such a fine establishment.


We also got great support for the event from Marani Spirits, which is a locally-based spirits company whose main product, Marani Vodka, is made, literally, with milk and honey. As in "the land of milk and honey." And as anyone who attended can attest, those ingredients give it a noticeable and unique smoothness and flavor that any seasoned vodka sipper can notice. Marani's COO, Ani Kervorkian, was kind enough to give the go-ahead to sponsor the party with their fine product, and to send along Kamron Hakhamimi (aka The Party Doctor) to direct the festivities. The event would not have been possible without the efforts of these fine people and their superior product, and HappyHourLA wishes to extend to them the sincerest thanks. We hope that we'll be working with them again, and we also hope that you'll start looking for their products at your favorite liquor store and demanding your vodka and soda be poured with Marani at your favorite Happy Hour.



We were also lucky enough to rope into helping two local artists who added just the right amount of extra to the festivities. Amelia Burns was kind enough to bring along her camera and shoot the event for us, and the very talented and handsome Johnny Fraser came out and filmed, cut, and packaged an amazing promo for the site (you can see his delightful, French New Wave-inspired-and-informed work/photography/film here). Again, we at HappyHourLA are extremely gratified to have such talented friends, and we're even more thankful that these friends like us enough to put their talents to work for the site. Make sure to check out the video at YouTube, where you can view it in all its HD, full-screen glory. And comment on it.




Since we're in the thanking mood, we'd also like to give plenty of same to Janean Lesyk, who, after designing the entire site, has in effect become our partner/design guru/trusted adviser here at HappyHourLA. We couldn't do this thing without her help and support. Make sure to check out her great design work here. We'd also like to thank Tess Osborne, Eric Derrington, Erich Lochner, Michael Jedrzejewski, and Jinnie Rosales for all the continued support of the site, its operators, and events.

Give me a second.

Sorry, I had something in my eye. Anyway, that was our first "Five Ring Friday" event. We surely hope that there will be more coming up soon, and that everyone who reads and uses the site can make it out to one. Thanks for reading.

A Bright Idea, But Done Alva Wrong

Name: The Edison
Coordinates: 108 W. 2nd St., 90012
Neighborhood: Down-town, circa 1909
Happiest Hours: Mon.-Fri., 5-7pm, with varied "specials" throughout the week

Those who know me know that I'm a nut for all things turn-of-the-century. Bicycles with big front wheels, gaslamps, labor disputes -- this is an era in which I wish I could have lived. So, from that particular point of view, now is a great time to be alive in Los Angeles.

You might say that we're going through a mini-revival in fin de siecle culture at the moment. From the renewed interest in downtown LA to the current "classic cocktail" motif that's all over town (see below), the early 20th Century is huge. Like John Fante huge. And there's no bigger (in size or reputation) player on that field than downtown LA's The Edison.

Now, my main man Cedd Moses may dispute this assertion. I'd be disappointed, in fact, if he didn't. After all, Moses holds the current crown for "Authenticity" among downtown tavern-and-saloon types. He owns places like the Golden Gopher (open since 1905), Cole's (1908) and The Varnish (2009, but acts like it's 1899), and he runs these places with an eye towards detail that is practically unmatched. I say "practically" because (and I'm not 100% sure about this) he doesn't appear to own a bar with turn-of-the-century electricity-generating equipment scattered about. Of course, I'm not very observant.

But while The Edison may have a lock on the most spectacular downtown venue -- and it is spectacular, as it looks like it's straight out of some steampunk enthusiast's wet dream -- it sort of drops the ball when it comes to the Happy Hour. Which, after all, is also a turn-of-the-century invention, given that working for 12 hours in a shirtwaist factory or coal mine generally only allowed an hour of happiness per day.

The Vitals: Like I said, The Edison is spectacular. It looks simply amazing, it's got all sorts of cool, old machinery all around, it's forty feet underground, and it's filled with all these hidden nooks and crannies in case you and your betrothed want to engage in a little premarital thigh-touching. The bartenders know their shit, are friendly, and make a fine 1902-themed libation. But the place is expensive, and their famous "theme nights" leave a little to be desired. After all, fine print is a little tough to read by flickering candlelight, or even by the first light bulb. The rules for "Soup Kitchen Friday" are laughably Byzantine -- you get one (1) $0.35 drink and an eighth of a grilled cheese, accompanied by a thimbleful of tomato soup. The rest of the drinks are a curious 40% off for the remainder of Happy Hour (5-7). I suppose I'm nitpicking here, since it's practically free, but these caveats would be nice to know before you gussy up (dress code, after all) and fight traffic to make it downtown for Happy Hour. After all, since it's 2009 as opposed to 1909, there are many more auto-carriages on the roads, and a lot fewer street-cars to get get us from the West-side to Bunker Hill, post-haste.

Stay Gold, Ponyboy

Name: Copa d'Oro
Coordinates: 217 Broadway Ave. Santa Monica 90401
Neighborhood: Santa Monica, brah!
Happiest Hours: All night Mondays, 6-8 Tuesdays-Fridays




I don't usually go in for fads.

I got my first Nintendo in 1997. I bought the first Interpol album last week. And I plan on getting one of those fixed-gear bikes the kids are riding sometime during Obama's second term.

There is, however, one current trend that I've been on the cutting edge of from Day One, and that is for the renewed appreciation for classic, well-mixed cocktails that hearken back to halcyon days of yore.

I offer the following as proof -- as my wife, my gastroenterologist, and my sponsor can all attest, I've been sucking back Manhattans for years now, I have a Moscow Mule instead of my morning OJ, and to me, coffee isn't real unless it's "Irish-ed up." Look, I don't need to defend myself to you.

But I'm just saying that this recent interest in cocktail culture is one trend I can get behind. After all, we covered Cole's in this blog already, and I do believe it got a pretty solid review. Much like, I'm comfortable in saying, the review that Copa d'Oro is going to get in 3...2...1.

I heard through the grapevine that Santa Monica's Copa d'Oro was, just this week, getting a new bartender who had a reputation as being quite the cocktailsmith. He had set up the bar at Comme Ca, a place well-known for its handcrafted drinks and attention to the kind of details that all of us fin de siecle fetishists go wild for. His name is Joel, and I knew he was my kind of barman when, after being asked if he preferred the title "mixologist" or "bartender," he replied, "I don't care what you call me as long as you don't call me late to cocktail hour."

Sigh.

The Vitals: Copa d'Oro is a small, dark place just off the Third Street Promenade in Santa Monica. Don't let the adjacent horribleness sway you, though -- this place has EVERYTHING going for it. Great drinks -- the Gold Rush, the Moscow Mule, the Aviation, and Tommy's Margarita were all standouts. Great prices -- the Happy Hour (6-8pm Tuesday-Friday, ALL NIGHT Monday) gives $5 signature drinks and great paninis between $4-$6. And, just in general, this place has the best bartenders...uh, mixologists, that I've come across in LA. These guys know their stuff, and they share it proudly with the patrons. Fresh ingredients, gleaming barware, and obscure but delicious liquors are all on clear display, but the most obvious display is the talent and passion of the guys in the vests.

Oh, by the way...

HappyHourLA is hosting its first ever HappyHour! On Friday, June 26th (that's in two days), we're gathering at Citizen Smith in Hollywood to celebrate...well, Happy Hour. Don't you understand by now that the only reason you need is Happy Hour? Click on the invitation-looking-graphic to your right for more info...

The Well Is Dry. It Will be Filled Again.

Fear not, fans, fellow tipplers, Irishmen, dockworkers, and various drink enthusiasts.

We haven't gone away. We've been here all along. The year is 1962, and we're private detectives on the motorcycle circuit.

No, wait. That was my dream last night. In reality, we here at HappyHourLA have been busy working on a big, big Happy Hour-related project. We're not telling what it is yet, but we will give you a hint. And that hint is over at our HappyHourLA Facebook fan page. Join the page. Look under "events." And do what the page says.

I'll leave you with the following sentiment. On June 26th (that's next Friday for the chronologically-impaired), the Happy Hour landscape of Los Angeles will be forever changed. In a good way.

A very good way.

Panic On The Streets Of Woodland Hills

Name: Pickwick Pub
Coordinates: 21010 Ventura Blvd. 91364
Neighborhood: The Valley outside, Dickensian London inside
Happiest Hours : 5-7, M-F


I've never claimed to be a world traveler.

For example, I've never been to England. I don't know what makes a British pub in, say, Santa Monica, more authentic than one in Woodland Hills. I have no way, as yet, to compare either establishment, neither of which are located in England and therefore equally inauthentic in that regard, with the real McCoy.

I just have to take their respective words for it.

And by that, I mean I literally take their words for it. Pleasing English accent on the barman/maid? Authentic. American accent? Charlatans. When I belly up to a bar that flies the Union Jack outside, I want to be called "governor," not "dude." I want to see darts being tossed, football on Sky, and shepherd's pie being devoured. If I walk through the door and I don't get at least two out of three, I'm out of there.

I guess I have high standards like that. I tend to have high standards for places I've never been to. And, in keeping with those standards, I deem Pickwick Pub in Woodland Hills to be the real deal.

The Vitals: Pickwick Pub on Ventura Boulevard is a pleasing enough English transplant here in Los Angeles. It's a lot like, say, Minnie Driver or Kate Beckinsale -- you don't really think about them unless they're right there in front of you, but when they are, things works out pretty well. As far as Happy Hour goes, it's a pretty English one. It goes from 5-7pm, and it's $5 for all draft beers with a few food specials scattered about. Needless to say, I stuck to what England is known to do well and not with what they're known to do badly. In all, though, not a bad place to throw back a pint, talk Lakers, and dream of the days when Britannia ruled the waves.

Not-So-Sweet Valley High...

Name: Kabuki Japanese Restaurant
Coordinates: 20940 Ventura Blvd. 91364
Neighborhood: The Valley. Like, duh!
Happiest Hours: 3-6pm, M-F

Let me tell you something about being from the Midwest.

Growing up on the Heartland isn't all catching fireflies, the smell of freshly mowed grass, and bottle rocket fights. It's not like the Coug says in "Jack and Diane" -- well, at least not entirely. There's a dark side to it that you don't read about in "Winesburg, Ohio" and the like. A dark suffering overlays the whole area at certain times and in certain ways. But what ways, you might ask?

Well, for one, you can't get good sushi.

I know. Shocking, right? But being 600 miles from the Atlantic Ocean, 1200 miles from the Gulf of Mexico, and 2500 miles from the Pacific Ocean does not augur well for the freshness of any given catch. Lake Erie perch and walleye are all well and good, but you'll likely not find those on the special board at Urusawa.

Let's just say that our favorite staple from the bounty and bosom of the seas, aside from the aforementioned native species, comes in a box with the picture of a man in a yellow slicker.

Mmmm....fish sticks.

But I digress. My point here is that when a Midwesterner like me moves to California, he's bombarded with all these options as to where to get sushi. I mean, that first drive down Ventura Boulevard was something to behold. Sushi place after sushi place, each with deals and each with beckoning signature rolls...how's a barefoot boy with cheek of tan supposed to decide?

My first decsion, and first favorite sushi place in LA, shows these six years later my stunning naivete. Kabuki Sushi, although rife with deals and value, just doesn't have that great of sushi. It's well-priced, and to the uninitiated, it'll do the trick, but there's many a better option for sushi, and even for Happy Hour sushi, in this fair city of ours.

If you have a rube that's fallen fresh off the turnip truck, though, I say you stuff him with it.




















The Vitals: As I mentioned, Kabuki's sushi is pretty mediocre. If you can deal with that, though, then by all means, roll in between 3pm and 6pm. There's a variety of rolls, sushi, and appetizers that are priced between $3.95 and $5.95, and giant beers are $4.95 with deals on various cocktails, wine, sake, and the like. The Ventura Boulevard location in Woodland Hills is nice and clean, if filled with Valley high schoolers (shudder!), and parking is ample. If you can overlook the gnawing feeling in your gut that keeps telling you that you could be doing better -- a LOT better -- then you should, like, TOTALLY go. You know?

By Way of Explanation...

I'm sure that, upon reading the post beneath this -- not coincidentally, our first new review in some time -- that you, gentle reader, were struck by a few things. First, I'm sure you were taken aback by its wit, clarity, and commitment to excellence in every way. That, of course, goes without saying.

But if you're like me -- handsome, a helluva dancer, and a certified menace on the squash AND racquetball courts -- you probably also noticed something else -- an unfamiliar graphic at the bottom of the post. You know, the one with some circles on it, and maybe some words nearby...you know the one?

Well, fellow imbiber, that graphic is not just for looks. Sure, it looks good -- that's part of the "commitment to excellence" to which I was referring earlier -- but it also serves a very important purpose. You'll note the word "rated" on the left side of the graphic. That, friends, means that the graphic serves as a quick, visual reminder of our highly subjective, often Byzantine, and sometimes downright cruel rating of any given place.

It's sort of a sop to this fast-paced, infographic, USA Today-esque world we live in. If you want to see what the team here at HappyHourLA thought of a given place, and you're too busy or too emotionally dead on the inside to bask in some truly beautiful language and cutting insights, you can just look at the pictures and know, instantly, how kickass this place really is.

Here's the breakdown:


One Ring: This rating means do not, under any circumstances, allow yourself to be dragged here. If you're the proprietor of this establishment, you should probably sell this dump and go man a tollbooth somewhere. In short, avoid at all costs.


Two Rings: OK, now we're getting somewhere. A place with this rating attached to it probably has at least one thing going for it. Cute chicks, good jukebox, nickel beers...something. Maybe worth poking your head in if you're feelin' frisky.


Three Rings: This is a place where you might find yourself even AFTER Happy Hour ends. I know, it sounds crazy, but this place might even have something that's worth...gulp...paying full price. Not a bad joint, in our estimation. Why don't you buy a round for the group to celebrate?


Four Rings: Why haven't you heard about this place yet? I'll tell you why...because you're busy spending your hard-earned money on a place that doesn't care if you live or die. The place with this rating, on the other hand, DOES care, and makes it easy, enjoyable, and highly enriching for you to come here. At a place like this, you never know what you'll see, but you can be damn certain that if we gave it this rating, it's going to be good.


Five Rings: Shangri-fucking-La. Drop what you're doing. Put the papers back in the "To Do" box, shove your stupid boss's stupid cornflower blue tie in his mouth, walk out the door, drive immediately here, and plan on calling a cab to get home. You're in it for the long haul. This place is the best of what's around.

C'est Formidable!

I took six years of French in school, spread out between high school and college, and "C'est Formidable!" is the best I can muster to describe our recent HappyHourLA outing at La Poubelle. Sure, I can tell you the finer plot points of "Les Jeux Sont Faits" or quote you a poem by Paul Verlaine, but ask me a simple question in French, and I'll just stare back blankly. In fact, you can actually see the gears in my mind turning as I vainly struggle to come up with an answer.

Oh, I know "C'est formidable" is an apt enough description, and I know that any attempt to dabble in the mother tongue of a place is always appreciated. I just wish I could come up with a little more of a flowery, verbose, and otherwise laudatory description of a place that so tickled our assembled coterie's fancy.

In fact, scratch that. "Formidable" doesn't even come close to describing the many hours we spent at this place -- hours that passed by like minutes, accented (get it?) by fine food, hearty drink, and, much to my chagrin, a Lakers' victory. I guess you can't have it all.

But we came awfully damn close at La Poubelle. Not only did they ensure that we had the virtual run of the place, but the owner, Francoise, made it her personal mission to make sure we were doing well. I like that. You know, feeling like a big man? It's why I almost joined the police force.

But that's a story for another day.

The Vitals: La Poubelle is a great French place tucked away in Franklin Village, and it offers all that you could hope for and more in such a place. It's small-ish, dimly-lit, and has a lively scene out on the smoking patio. The food is outstanding (I recommend heartily the fries, the mussels, and the white pizza) and well-priced for Happy Hour. The drinks are also well-priced ($3 house beers, $5 drafts and well drinks) and well-poured, and you know how important that is to me. In all, it was indeed "tres chouette."

In all, La Poubelle was one of the more satisfying Happy Hour experiences our crew has had to date. It almost had me on the table, belting out "La Marseillaise" while waving the tricoleur.

Almost.

Open the Pod Bay Doors, HAL...

After an unplanned (and unfun) hiatus, I'm proud to report that HappyHourLA is back up and running.

It's amazing how much computers (or the lack of them) can cripple you and your everyday life. I suppose it's only a matter of time before Skynet (led by Cyberdyne's Miles Bennett Dyson) really does control everything.

Anyway, we're back, and lest you think otherwise, we haven't been exactly resting on our laurels here, eating grapes hand-fed to us by our wives' handmaidens. We've been all over town -- Westside, The Valley, Franklin Village, and so on. I've got a major backlog of reviews to get up here, so stay tuned.