5.19.2009

A Man, A Plan, A Canal...Venice!

I've always had sort of a love/hate relationship with Venice, my neighbor to the southwest. On the one hand, my wife works there and loves the neighborhood. I have several good friends who live there. The whole canal thing is pretty cool, it's got some interesting history to it, and it's, of course, by the beach. These are good things, right?

On the other hand, it's filled with people who live in Venice.

OK, hold on, there. I'm not saying that all people who live in Venice are subject to my scathing derision. I'm not even saying that most people who live there are. It's just that I think we can all agree that there's a certain...I don't know, vibe to the place. I've heard many terms that seem applicable: "bourgeois bohemians." "Trustafarians."Privileged jerks who don't deserve to live that close to the beach and smell the salty sea air." And so on.

Whatever. I'm no class warrior, and as long as I don't have to sport a pair of hemp capris as I ride my beach cruiser or longboard to the next Happy Hour, I'm cool. Venice has some good places to go out, it's walkable, and the proprietors of its many establishments seem to vie healthily for my business.

To wit, we rolled into the Canal Club with an unusally strong contingent of HappyHourLA-ers, so I felt like I got a pretty good line on this place. Roomy yet confortably packed, with a wide array of specials to choose from (sushi AND burgers), I felt like this was place I could get behind. Sure, there were some indiosyncratic touches that made me scratch my non-Do-Ragged head a couple of times, but in all, not a bad place to waste the gloaming hours on a Friday night.

The Vitals: Canal Club has a pretty extensive menu for your Happy Hour perusal and enjoyment, both food- and libation-wise. There's a healthy array of drink specials for $5 (giant beers and ginger martinis -- yes, it's better than it sounds -- topped our personal lists) and the food is well-priced, if not necessarily apt to win any Michelin stars. The sushi was average and the fries had sort of a Velveeta/chipotle thing going on, but the slider (note: slider is singular) was a tasty burger. Service was also pretty decent, and the drinks were, if not spectacular, solidly made and not watered down, as so many Happy Hour drinks can often be.

And of course, there was ample beach cruiser and longboard parking. Put on your best flip-flops and roll on down.

5.13.2009

Malo and Just Really, Really Malo

This is my first twosome.

I know that sounds at once intriguing and disturbing. That's the way I do things. Things may seem normal, but scratch the surface, and a whole other level of weird is uncovered. It's a way to keep things interesting. Trust me -- I'm married.

Now, I'm not talking about odd sexual proclivities here; rather, I'm just drawing attention to the fact that this posting marks the first review wherein I've tackled two different establishments at the same time. If you find this in any way confusing, please see my above comments regarding "keeping it interesting."

In any case, I think you'll fins comparing these two places is a fairly adept way to go about things. First, both are located in Los Feliz -- or is one in Silverlake? Anyway, you can walk between them. Secondly, both are "cantina-type" establishments that take pride in their respective 5pm-7pm Happy Hours. Third, both are...well, I guess the similarities end there.

On the one hand, Cuba Libre on Vermont seems like a fairly straightforward Happy Hour destination. Not surprisingly, the food and beverages skew Cuban. That's good, I suppose, if you take away the whole trade embargo thing. Copious specials are well-signed to lure in foot traffic. Also good. But again, if you scratch the surface, you'll find it's something else entirely. Basically, it's a crummy Happy Hour destination. Drinks are weak, the place is as empty as a Baptist church in Riyadh, and I'm pretty sure it used to be a Thai/Pan-Asian restaurant of some sort. I don't know -- all I know is that I had been there before, and probably won't be going back. At least not as long as my Whiskey Soda is so heavy on the soda.

Owners, take heed. I know it's Happy Hour, and you're bummed that you can't charge me $10 for that bevereage you've plunked in front of me, but guess what? A strong (or at least regular-strength) drink means a return customer. End of story.

Malo's owners sem to understand this. Their Happy Hour shines in comparison with Cuba Libre's, if for no other reason than their Happy Hour pushes their signature margaritas. I was watching like a hawk, and it seems tough to water down a made-on-the-spot margarita. I guess it could be done, but with all that effort...wouldn't it just be easier to get me drunk enough to where I want another one? I know I didn't order a margarita at Cuba Libre, but I agree with the spirit of Malo's bartenders here -- make a decent drink on the first round, and you've got yourself a return customer. That return customer is me, by the way.

The Vitals: Malo, good. Cuba Libre, not as good. In fact, I'll go so far as to say there's really not much of a comparison. I didn't try the food at either place this time (hey, I know I'm a reviewer and all, but even I can't choke down more food than my body will allow. Drinks, on the other hand...). I have, however, eaten at Malo before, and it was more than decent. Great, even. Beef and Pickle tacos? Nice. And the deals are square at $2 per. Cuba Libre also has decent food specials ($1.95 fish tacos, other various delicious-sounding options), but you'll have to wait until I'm hungry again to get the skinny on that. Suffice to say, the food options at both places are empty-wallet friendly, but Cantina Malo takes the South-of-some-Border-or-another cake when it comes to beverages.

Next up? Back to the regular-sized, one-at-a-time updates. For everyone's sake.

5.12.2009

Well, Well, Well...

It's tough to be king. I don't usually disagree with Tom Petty about life's little lessons, but seriously -- when you're the best, people come gunning at you all the time. When you're the best at something, that means you've been a trailblazer. You, in your infinite wisdom and foresight, have come up with the best ideas first, and everyone else is grasping for your crown. Grasping with bony, usurping fingers. Stealing your ideas and always trying to one-up you.

Now, I realize that it probably sounds like I'm talking about myself. But I'm not.

I'm referring here to The Well, which, in my opinion, is currently Hollywood's King of Happy Hour.

It's not like I'm chronicling some recent rise to power here, either. The Well has sat atop the heap for some time now. It has fought off most challengers (at least on that side of town) and emerged victorious, proud, unscathed, and stronger for its trials.

You might call it the William the Conqueror of Hollywood Happy Hours. OK, you might not call it that, but that's what I call it. Because I'm a giant nerd.

The Vitals: Where to start? First of all, The Well's Happy Hour goes from 5pm-9pm. That's right -- until 9pm! Secondly, although their literature indicates that only well drinks are on special ($3!), they also do most non-well drinks at half-price. A Maker's Manhattan for $4? Good luck finding cheaper than that in Hollywood, Los Angeles, or this solar system. Third, the staff is attractive, delightful, attractive, attentive, and attractive. Fourth, the appetizers are also half-price. Typical barfood dominates here, but there are some pleasant diversions. Fifth, the crowd is eclectic and well-mannered -- a nice cross-section of everything LA has to offer. And finally, the jukebox kicks. The National. The Killers. The Smiths. Leonard Cohen. And more -- but what more could you want?

Go here today. At 5pm.

Next stop? More Los Feliz.

5.05.2009

You've Los That Lovin' Feliz, Pt. 1

I think in Los Angeles, maybe even more so than in places like New York or Chicago, we stick to our own neighborhoods. New Yorkists and Chicagoans, start your bitching...NOW!

Let's just say that although no matter where one lives one can be partial to his or her neighborhood; it just seems that in LA, this partiality borders on either obsession or paralysis. I have friends who won't leave the Westside except in a cab. Huh?

Not this guy, and to prove it, I trolled the area known as Los Feliz on my latest quest for cheap booze and marked-down food.

Now, this update is going to be a multi-parter, and I just wanted to get the ball rolling with an introductory posting. I have many opinions about Los Feliz, the Eastside of Los Angeles, and other related topics. But I'm too rushed to get into them here. For now, let's just say that many places were visited, many drinks were imbibed, and several service personnel were groped. OK, I made that last part up.


We began our evening at 1739 Public House, located at (go figure) 1739 Vermont in Los Feliz.

For such a clever name, I was expecting a lot more. What we got was full-priced drinks. And a free wheel of cheese pizza.

The Vitals: Now, I'm from the Midwest. Free pizza goes a long way (paying attention, ladies?), and I'm not made of stone, for God's sake! But I guess I thought there might be something more to this place. Other than the free pizza and $3 PBRs on Mondays and Wednesdays (but not Fridays?), it was pretty generic. "Upscale" looking nouveau-pub. Lots of beers on tap, as well as interesting serving mechanisms, but, awkwardly, no servers, a lame-ass jukebox, and ultimately a pretty flat vibe. If someone said, "Hey, Blue, remember how we live in a post-apocalyptic dystopia? And remember how 1739 Public House on Vermont is the last remaining restaurant on Earth?" If that were to happen, and that's a big "IF," I'd pull out my gun and my last 1,739 bullets, shoot the friend 1,738 times, and then use that last one on myself.

Not to be hyperbolic or anything.